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Frosted Flakes: Could I have been a linebacker?

The jury is out, but I’m thinking maybe not.

Wisconsin v Nebraska Photo by Steven Branscombe/Getty Images

It may not be a surprise to you that aside from some two hand touch backyard or recess games, I never played football.

So sometimes I wonder what position I would have been?

My senior year of high school, I had weights class with our football coach and I would always tell him that I think I’d be great linebacker. He’d always agree with me and tell me yeah that definitely would have been your position.

Looking back, I know for a fact he was lying to me. He was probably really pleased that I liked playing volleyball and he did not have to have me on his football team.

There are a few reasons for this:

  1. I was not fast enough to be a linebacker. Those offensive players would have buzzed right past me and I’d never be able to catch up.
  2. I’m not built like a linebacker. I went to a D2 high school, so the need for players on the field may have out weighed this. But it still would’ve been a problem.
  3. I don’t know that I could’ve actually hit anyone. I think the tackling part is the part that I thought I’d be good at, but I don’t know that I would’ve actually gone through with it. My little brother is four years younger than me and was real shit. He’d always fight me and win because I just didn’t have it in me to fight back.

If I wouldn’t have been a linebacker, what position would have been right for me?

Quarterback? I did have a decent spiral, but no speed and don’t know if I’d have the arm for that. Plus, there is that whole getting sacked thing that doesn’t sound great.

Running back or wide receiver? See above.

Tight End? Way too short, and slow, and weak.

On the line? That would’ve been very ineffective.

Defensive back? Did I mention jumping wasn’t my best quality either.

Kicker? Ehhh I don’t know that I’ve ever tested out the accuracy of my leg.

Perhaps being a fan is the best football position for me.

*This may sound like I’m really picking on myself, but I’m really just being realistic about my athletic abilities.


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