Adrian Martinez in a spoof of Ford vs Ferrari

Vincent Carchietta-USA TODAY Sports

I have not done one of these in years, but my favorite will always be the Star Wars one. But, thought of this one so thought I would share. This is a spoof on a scene in Ford vs Ferrari where Shelby is convincing Ford to give them another shot at building a winning racecar.

[Adrian Martinez enters Coach Frost's office with all of the assistant coaches]

Adrian Martinez : Coach Frost. Gentlemen.

Coach Frost : Adrian…Give me one reason why I don't cut everyone associated with this abomination starting with you.

Adrian Martinez : Well, sir... I was thinking about that very question as I sat out there in your lovely waiting room.

Adrian Martinez : As I was sitting there... I watched that little playbook right there go through four pairs of hands... before it got to you. 'Course that doesn't include the 22 or so other coaches who probably poked at it before it made its way up to your office. All due respect, sir, you can't win football by quarterback committee. You need one man in charge. Now, the good news, as I see it, is that even with all the extra weight, we still manage to put old Mr. Big Ten exactly where we want them.

Coach Frost : Did we?

Adrian Martinez : Oh, yes.

Coach Frost : Expand.

Adrian Martinez : Well... sure, we hadn't... We haven't worked out how to pass yet. Or stay fundamentally sound. Or maintain ground game. And a lot of stuff broke. In fact, the only thing that didn't break was well… nothing. Hell, right now, we don't even know if our jerseys will last the whole 60 minutes.


Adrian Martinez : But our last game... we clocked 620 yards of offense down the NJ Turnpike. Now, in all of 2020... old Big Ten ain't never seen anything move that far. And now they know, without a doubt, we're better than they are. Even with the QB by committee... And that's what they’re thinking about while they’re sitting in Rosemont, right now. They are scared to death... that this coming year, you actually might be smart enough to start trusting me. So, yeah. I say you got Big Ten exactly where you want them. You're welcome.

Coach Frost : Come here…See that little field down there? In the 1990s, three out of ten National Champions rolled off that field. This isn't the first time the Nebraska Cornhuskers gone to war in CFB. We know how to do more than push bulletin board material. And there is one man running this team. You report to him. You understand me?

Adrian Martinez : Yes, sir.

Coach Frost : Go ahead, Adrian. Go to war.

Adrian Martinez : Thank you, sir.

(Note: A few liberties were taken with the dialogue from the movie and I am fairly certain that other B1G teams had more than 620 yds of offense this season. All of this was necessary to make it work.)

(For reference, here is a link to the scene.)

This FanPost created by a registered user of Corn Nation.