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College Football Week 0 Predictions: The Wait is Almost Ov-ah!

Football is just a week away!

Alabama vs Missouri Photo by Kent Gidley/Collegiate Images/ Getty Images

Mike: One more week until the Huskers try to play again! However, more cancellations gives us another fairly bleak limited of games for this week.

Patrick: I hope these games live up to the Sunbelt ones that proceeded them this week.

Andy: It’s just a cough.

Jll: My lptp hz brkn kybrd. Kybrd dsnt typ vwls, nvrmnd...sht.

Texas A&M (-5) at Mississippi State

Patrick: Mike Leach is still figuring things out in Starkville. Or more importantly, Starkville is still trying to figure out Mike Leach. Texas Agricultural & Mechanical University 48 Mississippi State University 27

Mike: Two teams going in opposite directions. A&M knocked off Florida while the Pirate ship threw more interceptions (six) than scored points (two) last week. Based on last week, A&M should win 63-0. But this is 2020 where weird reigns. A&M 38, Hail State 14.

Andy: I’m gonna take it a step further based on zero evidence whatsoever - which is the acceptable norm these days. Lots of good people tell me (snicker) that the knob-headed galoots at the aTm are still bent out of shape at Mike Leach for disparaging remarks he made about the Aggie army while at Texas Tech. You know, where he said if aTm can have a make-believe army and dress up guys in military unis, then he can have a fake pirate crew and give them parrots & peg legs & pirate hats.

Anyway, A&M is so hell bent on revenge still, they will lose focus and fall the Dred Pirate Leach and his Air Raid (a staple of pirate marauders) by the count of 53-49.
(And if A&M wins, this was fake predictions)

Jon: Texas A&M just had a huge win. Miss State just had a disappointing loss. I interpret this as the Aggies are in for a letdown game, while Miss State is due for an explosive game. Oh, not really. I’d just like to see Mike Leach have more fun than Jimbo Fisher. Miss State 45 Texas A&M 42

Jll: Pls snd nw kybrd. Txs&M 45 Mss St 34

Georgia (+4.5) at Alabama

Patrick: Game of the week time. Bama & Georgia actually match up well in terms of depth and talent. I think this game comes down to coaching. The University of Georgia has bitten me on predictions for over a decade now so I am cautious to give this game to them. However, I think having Saban off the sideline might be the difference maker. University of Georgia 23 University of Alabama 21

Andy: Another positive case which answers the question, “Can the devil catch Covid?” I hope his absence on the sideline makes the difference but recent history says Georgia will race out to an early lead and piss it down their leg. At least they're spreading it out this year, even if the strategy is still blunt force trauma. Prove me wrong, doggies. Bama 30 Dawgs 28

Jon: Andy has it right. We will all be laughing at Nick Saban early, but until Georgia proves they can win under fire, why would anyone pick in their favor? Alabama 31, Georgia 28

Jll: Crmsn Td dn’t wnt 2 ply dfns. Hvn’t wtchd th Blldgs. Cvd? Wht cvd? Sbn’s Tm 28 Grg’s Tm 20

Mike: Wait, and now Saban is testing negative and might be on the sideline after all? Does this mean that Nick Saban might be more powerful than COVID-19? Well, if that’s the case... ‘Bama 31, Dawgs 21

Central Florida (-3) at Memphis

Patrick: I like Memphis. I know some good people in Memphis. If you ever go, get some good BBQ (plenty of places to eat) and go to Goner Records for some quality vinyl. University of Memphis 52 Central Florida University 38

Andy: I don’t know anyone I’m aware of in Central Florida or Memphis. I’m pretty sure on reputation alone I’d much prefer the BBQ cuisine of Memphis to whatever slime they shoveling into people at Disneyworld but I don’t think that’s gonna help Memphis too much unless SMU is D-1’s best-kept secret. UCF 40 Memphis 21

Jon: We’re doing a lot of cleaning lately, and I came across an autographed copy of Josh Heupel’s book after he nearly won the Heisman. I forgot I had it. Even personalized it. Therefore, I’m picking UCF. That’s enough for me! UCF 52 Memphis 50

Jll: Cntrl Flrda rlls. Knghts 44 Tgrs 24

Mike: Fun fact: the best meal I had at Disney World was a BBQ shack at their Animal Kingdom park. But you don’t go to Disney for the food. You don’t go to Orlando for the music, either. But if it’s football you are after, you go to the state of Florida, not Tennessee. UCF 45, Memphis 31.