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Five Reasons Nebraska Will Lose: Illinois

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FEAR THE BEARD!

NCAA Football: Illinois at Nebraska Bruce Thorson-USA TODAY Sports

I was wrong again, but believe me this time when I say Nebraska is going to lose. Northern Illinois big brother wants some revenge for Saturday and they’re going to get it. There’s no way Nebraska gets 75 percent of the wins it got last year this early in the season.

Lovie Smith Has a Great Beard

Lovie Smith may not be a great coach, but he has a GREAT beard. I mean just look at it. If there’s one guy who I want my beard to look like, it’s him. That beard just makes him look extremely knowledgable.

Plus, Scott Frost doesn’t even have a mustache so how can we expect to compete against Illinois. Imagine if we played them in November... It would be like a million to a goose egg in the favor of the Illini.

Scott Frost Hasn’t Won a Road Game at Nebraska

Frost is probably looking at this upcoming game in tears. Champaign, IL is a MUCH tougher place to play than Boulder, CO. Their fans don’t throw anything at our players so they can’t get any reps catching on the sideline.

There won’t be nearly as many Husker fans in Illinois as there were in Colorado, so this team is going to be shocked at how extremely loud it’s going to get inside the stadium. Come to think of it, Illinois might be the toughest place to play in the B1G.

They Have Every USC Transfer EVER

Anybody notice how all of the players transferring out of USC came to Illinois? Obviously it’s because Illinois is a much better place to live and play than Southern California. There’s no other explanation.

Those former Trojans probably thought to themselves: “Man, it would be great to play in the amazing state of Illinois for a blue blood program on the rise!” Then they all carpooled to Illinois and there was NOTHING else to it.

College Gameday MIGHT be in Lincoln Next Week

Since I’ve been alive Nebraska likes to not show up during big games on national television. Frost knows this team isn't ready to beat Ohio State, and is going to throw the game on Saturday to make sure Kirk and the gang don’t come stumbling into Lincoln.

If they somehow still make it, Corso will put on a cornhead and take a bite out of a corncob and yell “Skers by 90!” That will curse us and we’ll be set back another two decades.

Illinois Lost to Eastern Michigan

The only reason the Illini lost this past week was because they were looking ahead to the Nebraska game. They wanted to make sure to start conference play off strong so they could finally make it to Indianapolis.

Illinois will beat Nebraska because they’ve basically been preparing for two weeks. I’m guessing the Huskers give up 40 points to that outstanding offense, and lay an egg on offense once again.