CN sources inside the Nebraska football program tell us that Scott Frost is commonly overheard making “zoom”, “vroom”, and “rooaaarrr” noises during spring football practice. The sounds that Frost makes and the volume at which he makes them are reflective of how well the offense is doing.
Offensive line coach Greg Austin told a CN insider, “Right now Nebraska’s offense sounds like a 1956 Ford Fairlane. An Unrestored 1956 Fairlane. It barely runs. You hope it gets you to where you’re going before it falls apart. We’ve got to get much better.”
“You should have heard him last year. Holy crap, you’d swear that UCF offense was a Mazda 787B.”
“No, no, no. More like a Porsche 917”, interjected Offensive Coordinator Troy Walters. “Like the car Steve McQueen drove in the 1971 movie ‘Le Mans’... Except we don’t want no wreckin’ going on.”
Walters says to not expect too much from the offense this season. “The absolute best we can hope for is a 1968 Chevy Camaro SS with a 396 and a Hurst shifter.”
Quarterback coach Mario Verdusco thinks that’s a stretch. “I’d shoot for a 1962 Chevy Impala. It’s not going to be that exciting, but you’ll get where you’re going. If we can get that far this season, it will be a good first season.”
Frost has been making such noises throughout his coaching career, but this is the first time that it may be a cause for concern. Frost tends to make specific car sounds that might give away an offensive play call.
“There’s a worry that another team might pick up his voice inflections with a parabolic mic. There’s a lot more going on on Big Ten sidelines than there was at UCF.”
CN asked if Frost’s habit was “weird.”
The coaches looked at each other.
“You obviously don’t know that Nick Saban makes tank sounds, or that Urban Meyer makes zooming jet noises,” added Verdusco.
Someone brought up P.J. Fleck at Minnesota.
“The guy with his boat rowing.”
The coaches laughed.
“We’re trying to go from a straight four to a V12, but Fleck is workin’ with an oar. What a doorknob”, finished Austin.