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Scott Frost Nixes “Avocado Toast” Playcall

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This is possibly the worst joke you’ll ever read. Blame the millenials!

NCAA Football: CFP National Championship-TBD Coach of the Year Reception Butch Dill-USA TODAY Sports

Corn Nation’s secret “special insider contacts” have discovered that Scott Frost intends to change one of his most important play calls.

Frost has developed a method of moving fast that is unparalleled in college football. His method of speed is so detailed that it involves chopping play calling down to a bare minimum, so much so that it takes at most three seconds to call a play. Frost frequently used the playcall “Avocado Toast” when he was at UCF to signify his best running play that his team could perform while moving quickly. Frost’s ISO running play was formally called “Green Right Slot 90 Lead” in the UCF playbook, but during certain games that call was changed to “Avocado Toast” to not only shorten the concept, but to confuse opponents who might have intercepted the call.

Frost’s advisors at Nebraska have warned him that the “Avocado Toast” playcall becoming public could offend one of the most powerful political groups in all of Nebraska football, the Nebraska Beef Council. While it might’ve worked at UCF, “avocado toast” is a phrase associated with millennials, who while appreciated at the University of Nebraska are not amongst those who donate to the athletic department. Avocados are not grown in Nebraska, while beef is one of the state’s biggest exports.

On the recommendation of his advisers, Frost has since decided to change his fast running play play call to “Prime Rib” to satisfy the Nebraska Beef Council.

“Prime Rib could be easily associated with the Wishbone”, said psychological branding expert Ben Cattle (his real name), “and that could turn into a real marketing opportunity for the athletic department, especially if the play is repeatedly successful.”

When reached for comment Nebraska’s legendary coach Tom Osborne stated that he wasn’t concerned about Frost’s play calls and “couldn’t understand how people could make toast out of avocados anyway.”