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Corn Flakes: What Lists Should We Be Making? Help!

Where we go a little off the rails about lists.

A comprehensive list of what's wrong with Nebraska's football team.
I’m not sure this will ever become outdated.
Jon Johnston

Sporting News has a slideshow...

I hate slideshows. I cannot think of anything cheesier about web site design/presentation than doing a fucking slideshow of a list. Isn’t that a listception? Shouldn’t that destroy the internet as we know it? What’s even better is if the slideshow has auto-play videos. And ads. Lots of ads. Them webzones gotta make their money.

It seems to be “list” season all around the internets. Look at the lists I’ve clipped below. You’ve got your Top 25 quarterbacks of 2017. You’ve got your “Best College Football Player” lists. There’s the “Best Coaches Ever” list, which isn’t going to change until Nick Saban is dead, not retired, because when you’re a legendary coach at Alabama dead and retired are the same thing.

People love lists. They give us something to discuss and you need that, because you’re bored. You don’t have to kill for your food daily and most virulent diseases have been under control for quite some time (at least where you live). If you’re young, you probably have college debt up to your eyeballs, but so does everyone else, so why worry?

You find yourself going to social media sites because... lists. You have timelines on Facebook, which are really just lists. Tweets, another form of lists, you retweet and you’re not just showing your approval of said tweet, but you’ve started making your own damned lists.

I offer the list below as proof of my claim of incessant need for lists. This is on a well-respected media web site. It’s not really news, is it, UNLESS YOU MUST KNOW WHICH CHAIN STORES ARE TAKING OVER LINCOLN, THEN THANK GOD THIS LIST EXISTS.

The 13 biggest chains in Lincoln | Local |
Which chain stores and restaurants are on most every major corner in Lincoln? See the list here.

I cannot fight this kind of determination. Therefore, to the making of lists we must go. However, I am not quite ready to give away all my ideas for lists of things for you to discuss, as then they’d be gone, and we’re only a few weeks away from the darkness of the offseason.

Therefore, I’d like your help in generating list ideas.

I can promise we won’t make them into a slideshow.

But I can’t promise I won’t make them into polls.

... of their Top 25 quarterbacks for 2017. It’s the usual suspects showing up at the top of the ratings, as Michigan, Ohio State and Penn State out of the Big Ten placed their starters in the Top 25.

Three out of 25 doesn’t sound all that great for the Big Ten, but these things tend to run in cycles.

  • #5 J.T. Barrett, Ohio State
  • #7 Trace McSorley, Penn State
  • #21 Wilton Speight, Michigan

Honorable Mention

  • Richard Lagow, Indiana
  • Clayton Thorson, Northwestern
  • Alex Hornibrook, Wisconsin


Ranking the top 25 Power Five college football coaches entering the 2017 season -
CBS Sports ranked every head coach in the Power Five conferences from 1-65

2017 College football coach rankings: Power Five coaches ranked 65-26 -
The first half of our ranking of every Power Five coach in college football from 65 to 1

College football Power Rankings: Alabama leads post-spring top 25 |

Very little of what occurs during spring practices or spring games should be given much heed. But the end of those workouts is nevertheless another signpost along the way to the approaching season, which means it’s an opportunity to take those few clues and crumbs of information and turn them into analysis of what’s to come this fall

Where they rank Texas AND Oregon because they're sooooo sure those teams will make it back on the winning side of things this year. Where's Notre Dame you shits? Why isn’t Notre Dame good enough to make your early list of greatness this season?


What we can learn from Nebraska QB Tanner Lee’s highlights at Tulane

We set out to see what we could learn from Lee’s Tulane highlights. So here are Lee’s 11 touchdown passes from his 2015 season at Tulane, ranked and dissected.

It’s a list, disguised.

HC Mike Riley Meets Chance the Rapper

I don’t know what this means, really, but both the LJS and OWH decided it was worth an article, so I’m just mentioning it here.

Will the Early Signing Period be great for everyone? - Off Tackle Empire
Brian assisted with a recruiting thing at OTE. And then he got this in the comments:

A battle rages at Kansas State over whether Bill Snyder's son will be his successor -
Sean Snyder has spent more time with the Wildcats than his father, but his elevation is not a given

JUST IN: 'Stupid plan' results in home invasion, robbery arrest of 3 UI football players |

Three University of Illinois football players are expected to be formally charged Thursday after they allegedly robbed a man of cash in a residence hall early Wednesday.

Champaign police Lt. Dave Shaffer said the incident appeared to be a “stupid plan” that went awry when the victim recognized the voice of one of the men, ultimately leading to the arrest of all three.

My God, this is stupid. I mean, unbelievably stupid.

Don’t Just Shut Up and Play | The Players' Tribune
And the third response went something like this: Just shut up and play basketball! People also said things that were much worse, of course, but given that children may read this, I’ll spare you the graphic details.

Indiana looks for strong finish to aid Big Ten seeding, NCAA hopes - The Crimson Quarry
With seven games left, the Hoosiers have put themselves in great shape for an NCAA Tournament berth. But a big final two weeks could help improve their Big Ten seeding and lock up an NCAA bid.


I feel like there should be more here, but there isn’t.