Nebraska Football: Practice Report - Mark Banker Says The Defensive Line Needs “Movement”

The Huskers had another practice today. Things happened. The media was there. After practice, defensive coordinator Mark Banker talked to the media.

He said this, courtesy of the Nebraska Athletic Department:

"From practice to practice we've done a lot of instillation and [the defensive line has] listened in the meeting and they've gone out - in the walk-throughs - [and completed] their assignments pretty good," Banker said. "[As for the pass rushing,] one on ones have been okay. I think [Joshua Kalu] brought some concepts and technique and they're working them. Yesterday in our third down team period... [Ross] Dzuris had a nice up and under move, somebody later on had a nice [play] so it's coming [along]."

He gave an injury update on Michael Rose-Ivey.

And Lamar Jackson.

Banker also gave credit to individual players for their hard work so far, including junior linebacker Marcus Newby. "Marcus [Newby] has done a great job as an athlete of the game - to listen and take the coaching," Banker said.

"He's just evolved. The mistakes are being minimized. He understands the game a lot better. Maybe it's the simplicity of what we're doing, as far as how we try to stack principles and concepts on one another, but he's worked hard to get himself in the position [he's in] right now as a linebacker."

Mark Banker said this.

Whatever the hell that means.

Banker said that in spring, they reminded him of “Moe, Larry, and Curly”, which would be a hilarious reference if it WASN’T OUR DEFENSIVE LINE.

Ross Els, that is.

At one point, Banker had this to say on the audio released by the AD:

“Again, movement. Last year, yeah. You could just run into somebody if you want to do that, but every once in a while you gotta mix a little chocolate and strawberry with a vanilla or something.”

Regular media guys take that kind of stuff and translate it into what they think he was trying to say that will make sense so that people will want to read it. This is why people complain about being misquoted.

I think he was talking about Neopolitan ice cream. I hate Neopolitan. I was the youngest in a big family and everyone else would get chocolate and vanilla and leave me with crappy strawberry. Screw you, Mark Banker, you neopolitan-loving sonofabitch.

Then Banker did that thing in front of the media where you pretend your radio is broken and you make squelchy dead airwave noises. He then walked off, acting like he was invisible. Kinda creepy if you ask me, but I’m not the one who hired him to be defensive coordinator.

People talked about weight, because that’s important.

FREEDOM!!!!!!

Then people make videos on their phone and used emojis to convey stuff of which I don’t understand one damned bit.

Yay!

Nobody mentioned “motor”.

Our season is doomed.