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Big Red Cobcast: We Challenge Nick Saban To A Duel

Ryan's tired of hearing about Nick Saban. So he wants to fight him.

Butch Dill-USA TODAY Sports

This is it. My Husker opus. I, Ryan Tweedy, hereby challenge Nick Saban to a battle of fisticuffs. I know what your saying, "But Ryan, he's old" Yeah he's little too. Super little, like Ryan Seacrest little or any player that-doesn't-pick-Nebraska-on-NSD's IQ little.

I know this makes me seem like a bully because well I'm a man of extraordinary strength and conditioning and Nick Saban is a cheater BUT I want you to know that I'm doing this for us. I will fight Nick Saban for all that is right in this world. I'm Bernie Sanders and Nick Saban is, well, Nick Saban. Or to keep with the political theme, I'm Bernie Sanders and Nick Saban is Genghis Khan, raping and pillaging the NCAA rules and buying a dynasty. NICK SABAN I'M COMING FOR YOU. YOU'LL KNOW IT'S ME BECAUSE I'LL BE WEARING A CAPE AND BLASTING HULK HOGAN'S THEME SONG.

And guess what Nicky Poo, I can't be bought.

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