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Big Red Cobcast: Rematch

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We'll see you in Indianapolis, Urban.

Greg Bartram-USA TODAY Sports

I'm still not scared of Ohio State.

They are the Free World and we are B-Rabbit. They jumped us, in front of our little sister, and we're still standing here with our middle fingers in the air. Tim Beck is the dude that bangs Eminems girlfriend, Mike Riley is mekhi phifer, Bruce Read is Cheddar Bob and Coach Dubs is probably the guy that's supposed to be "Bizarre".

It won't be long until we battle rap JT Barrett and he chokes on the biggest stage in front of all his fans and then they become our fans and start yelling, "402 - F**k The Ohio State - 402 - F**k the Ohio State - 402 - F**k the Ohio State - 402 - F**k the Ohio State."

Oops there goes gravity. Tommy Armstrong has vomit on his sweater already and just like Eminem said when he was battling addiction, "I'm not afraid". The Huskers are whatever you say they are and the only real question left is "Will the real Nebraska Cornhuskers please stand up?"

So to make a long story short - I want a rematch.

Here's how this happens:

Step 1: Nebraska wins out.

Step 2: Wisconsin loses to Minnesota (or any other team).

Step 3: Ohio State beats Michigan.

Step 4: We play Ohio State in Indianapolis.

Step 5: We beat Ohio State like they owe us money.

Step 6: Urban Meyer retires.

Step 7: All their recruits decommit.

Step 8: The program does a free fall as Tim Beck is announced as new Head Coach.

Step 9: We laugh last.

Step 10: We laugh best.

There it is, my 10 step plan to ruining the Ohio State football program.

Mom's spaghetti.

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