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I'm proud of our boys. See, Wisconsin thinks they have us because of the "final score" or the "win/loss column" but we have them right where we want them. We are doing to them what one might call a "long con". We lead them on for several years, let them think that they are getting the better of us and then "BAM" we destroy their program permanently.
Nebraska may seem like a puppy now but they are more like ferocious bear cubs just trying to find their blood lust or, better yet, a sleeping mother flippin' yeti that's waiting to pounce when the time is right. And when the time is finally perfect, the whole football world will have hell to pay. Starting with those fat cats up in NCAA, New York and ending with the lowly, slimy, grease under our feet, Hawkeyes. We won't stop until we are reigning college football champions of the universe. WE WILL DESTROY EVERYBODY.
Starting next week we bring back the broken chair trophy from Minne-suck-ya (I know guys these aren't good sometimes but the other options were mini-sota or minn-duh-sota - better ideas go in the comments). The season starts today, kids. So let's get it together and beat those smiley, almost-canadians like they owe us money.
Let's be honest, Minnesota is just a sleeper cell of canucks trying to take over America and they decided to start with Husker football. Are we gonna let that happen? Nope! USA USA USA!!!
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