Huskers.com has been running a contest over the past month to celebrate 125 Seasons of Husker Football. The contest, coming to an end today, featured a most fascinating collections of Husker memorabilia, and the winner will be selected by popular vote, and win some fantastic prizes!
I admit that I am not a collector of things. I am not a big fan of "stuff", because I'm lazy. Once you get a whole lot of stuff, you have to have a place to put your stuff, then take care of your stuff, clean your stuff, and then when you die someone else has to figure out what to do with all that stuff. I wouldn't want to do that to my loves ones because I care so much about them (everyone in my family who read that just spit up whatever was in their mouth at the time).
But if I could have a collection of anything Huskers related (and I do mean ANYTHING), it would include things like this (thanks to contributions from the CN staff):
- The arm of the Miami player who knocked away the go for two pass attempt in the 1984 Orange Bowl, severed off and kept on ice in a cooler that I could take out every once in a while and show my friends.
- Shevin Wiggins' shoe.
- Callahan's heart so I could drive a stake through it to make sure he never comes back. If you have to guess which Callahan this is referring to, I can't help you.
- Broderick Thomas' house key.
- Dan Beeebe's disembodied head in a jar so we could hook it up to electrodes and make his eyes open to amuse our friends and neighbors. That one where we go "FUCK YOU DAN BEEBE" and his jaw drops open never gets old.
- Scotty Baldwin's tear-away wardrobe, because we went there.
- Lawrence Phillips' climbing rig.
- Some of Bo Pelini's spittle in a jar so I could rub it on myself from time to time to make me more of the toughest sunofabitch around because I believe it could really do that for me. Maybe he should bottle it and sell it as a Viagra substitute.
- Abdul Muhammad autographed team photo - gang sign edition.
- Carl Pelini's Colorado greaseboard.
- Bob Devaney's flask(s) - no explanation needed.
- Bob Devaney's skirt collection - you know one exists somewhere, right?
- The sound of Tom Osborne swearing as a teenager. (COME ON YOU KNOW HE HAD TO AT SOME POINT DADGUMMIT)
- An autographed Lawrence Phillips jersey. (I actually have one of these!)
- The gun Johnny Rodgers used to rob that gas station.
- A lock of Matt Davison's hair, because I'm pretty sure that's rare, so rare that Davison hisself wouldn't mind having some.
- Frank Costa's tears in a hermetically sealed glass so that someday he could be cloned and that clone could be pounded into the turf by the clone of Dwayne Harris playing for the Cornhuskers in 2035.
- The negative image that flashed in the brain of that Wisconsin player when Kenny Bell hit him and got flagged for it.
- Kordell Stewarts eyeballs so that we could play show our children what "deer in the headlights" really means. (When he's through with them, though, we're not complete monsters.)
- Whatever thing it is that would cure childhood diseases so that kids like Jack Hoffman and Avery Harriman don't have to suffer and so that we could have all found out how beautiful Lacey Holsworth would have turned out as an adult. I would, of course, share this item with the world.