Corn Flakes: Nebraska Fan Base Confusing New Coach With New Girlfriend

From what we know, which is little, new coach Mike Riley has made several hires for his Nebraska staff. These include Linebacker Coach Trent Bray, Offensive Line coach Mike Cavanaugh, Special Teams coach Bruce Read and Defensive Coordinator Mark Banker, all of whom were part of Riley's staff at Oregon State. None of these have been confirmed by the Nebraska Athletic Department.

Part of the narrative says that Bo Pelini failed because he didn't hire great assistants. Now Mike Riley might fail before he even coaches a game because he hasn't hired great assistants, at least in the eyes of the Husker faithful.

You see what's going on here?

This is like trying to find a new girlfriend but making sure she does NONE of the things your "I just got rid of her" girlfriend did.

Your new wannabe girlfriend never knew that your old girlfriend loved strawberry ice cream and wonders why the hell you're looking at her that way when she orders strawberry. She hasn't a clue what she's done wrong and you're probably not even going to bother telling her, but in your eyes it's "here we go again" and "how did this happen?" and "what is wrong with this person?".

Your new girlfriend is doomed before you've even given her a chance, all because of strawberry ice cream.

Damned shame, too, because if you'd only given her more of chance you might discover she'd do that one thing you've always wanted that you haven't had in years.

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Predictions
Nebraska has a 39% chance of beating USC on a neutral field.