/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_image/image/27323167/p1010220.0.png)
Did you hear?
According to the Omaha World Herald, the Nebraska Tourism Commission is doing a study to come up with a new state slogan and symbol to "better promote and brand the state for visitors"!
The old "Good Life" slogan has been around since 1963 and although it's synonymous with the state, is really outdated, especially for them people living in Omaha and maybe Lincoln who look down on the state's agricultural heritage as if doing things like lawyerin' and stock investin' are more noble professions than growing the food that feeds the world.
"The commission's study, expected to be finished in time for the 2014 tourism season, would also replace old tourism slogans like "Possibilities ... Endless" and the unofficial state symbol, which has been a Conestoga wagon, according to Kathy McKillip, the executive director of the commission.
"I'm not saying that Western culture is not part of our DNA, but it's certainly not 21st century marketable," McKillip said."
Here at Corn Nation, we're all about Nebraska's marketability, and would like help the state discover a new slogan, one that's more up to date and could be used on social media sites like twitter and facebook and would make people want to come to Nebraska.
I asked the CN staff for their suggestions for a new state slogan and here you go!
State Slogan Possibilities:
Nebraska: The Gateway To Colorado!
Nebraska: The speed limit is 75 but you can drive 90!
Nebraska: OMAHA (and then the rest of us)
Nebraska: Peyton Manning and Alexander Payne seem to like us.
Nebraska: "Home of the College World Series! That's about it. Turn around. RUN."
Nebraska: "Corn. Cows. College Sports.
Nebraska: "Unicameral government, bipartisan basketball."
Nebraska: Sorry About the Poo Smell
Nebraska, Nebraska - There I Said It Twice
Nebraska: More Than Just The Huskers
Nebraska: Football & Shit Else
These last two are very contradictory.
Nebraska: Beer, Beef & Broads - All Rolled Into One - Welcome!
Nebraska: Beer, Beef and Broads - What More Could You Ask For?
Could have gone with another "B" word for women here, but a lot of people would be offended by "broads" because people like being offended. We feel that the women of the state should be honored because we all know who's the better athletes. Not feeling honored? We'll just go ahead with that other "B" word then.
Nebraska: Land Flatter Than Any Woman You'll Find Here
Nebraska: Look for our hills!
Seriously, get off the interstate once in a while.
Nebraska: I-80 and more!
Whatever the hell "more" is, probably those hills you're supposed to look for.
Nebraska: We have that city Peyton Manning keeps talking about
Nebraska: You Know What They Say About Guys From State With A Phallic Capital Building? It's true!
Nebraska: Your bladder and gas tank will make you stop at least once.
Probably in North Platte, so won't fit well with Omaha.
Nebraska: We waste money on ad agencies.
Someone wasn't happy that they're spending money on this slogan thing.
Nebraska: Come Stare Down At F**king Cars From Our Arch
Nebraska: "The Arch Adds Intrigue"
I really have no idea what that means.
Nebraska: Don't Miss Our Homemade Kolaches!
Nebraska: Now With Indoor Plumbing!
Nebraska: Sandhill Cranes And Shit.... !
Nebraska: We're Changing Our Name To Buffet!
Nebraska: Home Of The Richest Man In The World
Nebraska: Probably Not As Broke As Your State
Nebraska: Voted Least Likely State To Slide Off Into the Ocean!
Nebraska: The Very Good Life!
In other words, kiss our collective asses, marketing people!
Nebraska: No Longer Targeted By the Soviets!
May not be true.
Nebraska: It's Not Too Bad.
Stolen:
Listening to 93.7 The Ticket. It's not too bad
— Trey Smith (@DryHuskerFrog) January 22, 2014
Nebraska: Them F*ckin' Trees Didn't Just Get There By Themselves You Know
Nebraska: 'We're hammered'
(In honor of Columbus and Lincoln being amongst the Top Ten drunkest cities in America.
And Omaha being #1 as the most Hungover City, which is probably true only because Nebraskans sober up at some point, while people from Milwaukee and New Orleans don't bother. Binge drinking is defined as having five or more drinks in one sitting? I bet if they changed it to a "five pack", someone would change the definition of binge drinking.
Nebraska: They'll never find that body in the Sandhills.
Did you know that the Sandhills represent the largest deposit of sand in the Western Hemisphere? That makes it pretty unique. Unfortunately, that's probably not "21st Century Marketable" especially if your marketing people aren't very creative.
New State Symbol Choices:
WARREN BUFFET
Picture Warren Buffet's head on Scrooge McDuck's body standing on a pile of gold. You'll have to picture it, because I suck at photoshop. If you are good at photoshop (which we really need here at CN) and send one to me, I'll put it right here!
KOOL AID GUY!
A JACKELOPE
Nah.... too "Western"
THE TREE PLANTER'S STATE
It was Nebraska's motto before "The Cornhusker State", and I can't think of a better one that suits both Nebraska's heritage and is 21st Century Marketable because it's all about being green.
So, our new state symbol?
WHAT WE'LL GET
We'll probably end up with something like "Open Sky, Open Land, Open People" and a state symbol that looks like one of those Olympic mascots created by a French designer who's never seen the state. You know.. a Sandhill Crane with a goldenrod in it's mouth and a dollar bill in it's talons. Cranes don't have talons, do they? WELL THEY DO NOW.