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Cobs of the Week: Florida International, Arkansas, West Virginia, Blackshirts, Michigan, and Athletic Directors Everywhere

Screw this game. Let's go get a pizza and a couple of beers.
Screw this game. Let's go get a pizza and a couple of beers.
David Butler II-USA TODAY Sports

Once again, it's time to vote for the worst of the weekend in college football. One of our ground rules is that each week is independent, so a nomination one week has no bearing on the next. Colorado has been nominated with much regularity, and last year, Iowa was as well. Unfortunately, that means Nebraska gets a nomination once again after yet another sub-par defensive effort.

And before you ask, no we didn't do these nominations back in the Steve Pederson error. So this is new territory for the Big Red. Hopefully, Bo Pelini gets the Blackshirts out of the Cobs crosshairs quickly. But before that, here's our nominations for the worst of the weekend in college football!

Florida International

Louisville won 72-0, and FIU only gained 30 yards of total offense for the day, which was shortened because the officials kept the clock running during the second half. Except it turns out to be a big misunderstanding. Seems FIU head coach Ron Turner told the officials that they were just going to run the ball to finish out the game, but the officials mistook the statement as a request to just run the clock in the second half. Deep down, I don't think FIU was all that upset about it.

Arkansas

Bert's new team blew a 17 point second half lead as Rutgers won 28-24, one week after Mrs. Bert taunted Wisconsin for their end-of-the-game clock snafu.

Another Jen, the wife of Ohio State assistant Mike Vrabel, fired back at Mrs. Bert to congratulate the future Big Ten team and to remind Mrs. Bert of the true meaning of the word #karma.

West Virginia

Speaking of new Big Ten teams, Maryland trucked West Virginia 37-0. And the game wasn't nearly as close as the score indicates.

Blackshirts

Zach Zenner might be up for the Walter Payton Award as the best player in division 1-AA, and if he wins it, he'll have Nebraska's defense to thank in large part, because the Huskers made it look so easy.

Michigan

The Weasels looked really good in their season opener, then defeated Notre Dame at home. But the last two weeks have been nightmares; they held off mighty Akron at home as the clock expired, then nearly lost this weekend to winless UConn. Yep, the same UConn that lost to 1-AA Towson to open the season. Ever since Devin Gardner changed his number to 98, he's been about as effective as a defensive lineman throwing the ball.

Athletic Directors Everywhere

Nebraska's body-bag game against South Dakota State was the norm this weekend in college football. There were so many games against 1-AA teams that even ESPN's College Gameday scheduled a 1-AA game, taking the show on the road to Fargo and the fans of North Dakota State. That made a great lead-in to the riveting San Jose State at Minnesota game. What a great weekend of college football! Not.