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The Reads: AN EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW

EXCLUSIVE!

By Salt Creek and Stadium

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Will Cobby leave for Illinois?
Will Cobby leave for Illinois?
In case you missed it, we had a shocking report yesterday afternoon.

It appears that the Illini are working to replace their logo to comply with the NCAA's new rules. To our surprise, we discovered that former Corn Nation Mascot Cobby is on the short list at Illinois.

Here's the photo he gave to Illinois. He appears to have worked out for this role.
We then reached out to Dear Leader, requesting a statement:

So with all this in place, I then sought out Cobby himself to ask the hard questions. Here's the full transcript of that call:

***
Salt Creek: Hey, Cobby, you there?
Cobby: ...DAGNABBIT. WHO IS THIS
Salt Creek: It's Salt. Look at the caller ID, buddy. Glad I could get a hold of you so quickly.
Cobby: How'd ya even get this number?!
Salt Creek: You're on a company phone...
Cobby: Bah. Takin' the free phone was a worse call than sending the house agains' Jawja!
Salt Creek: About that...Cobby, what's this about you going to Illinois?
Cobby: What's that?
Salt Creek: SB Nation has this report on you being approached by Illinois for their logo vacancy.
Cobby: Oh that.
Salt Creek: So it's true?
Cobby: Well, mayhaps it is. Who be askin'?
Salt Creek: We're just worried, that's all. Are you "Colonel Kernel"?
Cobby: Bah, I was hopin' y'all wouldn' notice.
Salt Creek: Where'd that name come from?
Cobby: It's my old wrasslin' name.
Salt Creek: May I ask why you want to leave Corn Nation? And for Illinois, of all places?
Cobby: I'm tryin' to leverage it.
Salt Creek: Excuse me?
Cobby: Good ol' Vince Marrow - he told me if I could get some other offurs, he could convince Marky Stoops to pick me up.
Salt Creek: I can't believe you.
Cobby: Well, that's the whole truth! And my family hates traveling on them icy roads in Nebrasky. Turrible, I tell you wot.
Salt Creek: Have you even been to Champaign-Urbana?
Cobby: Sounds like a fancy wine. Bet it's better than sock scotch!
Salt Creek: Is there anyway we can convince you to not go to Illinois?
Cobby: Give me my spot back. And my own office. And I want Barney Cotton's phone number. A bottle of 10 year old Laphroaig. And fire that bastard that took my job.
Salt Creek: You know we can't do any of that. And what would we do with ANGRYFOOTBALLGUY? He's done a fine job the last four months.
Cobby: It's reasoning like that which explains why Brion Carnes isn't QB. Oh sure, that Martinez fella is alright but he seems more excited with his modeling career for that glamour site, TunnelWalkOfShame.com!
Salt Creek: Brion Carnes...?
Cobby: He has more talented in his pinky than the entire team!
Salt Creek: What does this...nevermind. Cobby, when did this happen?
Cobby: The Illini 'cruitin' me? Well, Tim Beckman has been camped outside since early D'sember.
Salt Creek: December?
Cobby: Well, not like he had any other plans. The last time I called into that there radio show with that Brian fella and Greg, Mr. Beckman was knockin' at the door.
Salt Creek: That's just odd. So bottom line: are you leaving Corn Nation?
Cobby: I just really want a legitimate opportunity to start at mascot.
Salt Creek: So is that a yes?
Cobby: I'm still hoping for that Kentucky offer. I hear they're an up-and-coming team in the SEC!
Salt Creek: And if that doesn't come?
Cobby: Go Illini, Go!
***
And so there you have it, a surpisingly lucid conversation with our former mascot Cobby on his decision to leave Corn Nation for greener pastures, perhaps even in the SEC.

Edit: I just got off the phone with Cobby (again), who has informed me that he would NEVER leave Corn Nation for Illinois and that I must've been hoaxed. I apologized for my comments about his commitment and then he hung up on me. I guess I'll have to send him another bottle of scotch. Another source of mine has informed me the offer was pulled after Illinois received Cobby's counter-offer.

But they did say that someone else near and dear to our hearts was looking at greener pastures...if not Cobby, who?
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Women's Basketball Tonight!

Nebraska Cornhuskers (14-6, 4-3 Big Ten) at Ohio State Buckeyes (11-9, 1-6 Big Ten)

Thursday, Jan. 31, 7:30 p.m. (Central) Value City Arena (Columbus, Ohio)

National TV: BTN (Eric Collins-PBP; Stephanie White-Analyst)

Radio: 25-Station IMG College Husker Sports Network (PBP-Matt Coatney; Analyst-Jeff Griesch)

(107.3 FM-KBBK, Lincoln; 93.3 FM-KFFF, Omaha; 880 AM-KRVN, Lexington)

Free Internet Audio: Huskers.com

Go Nebraska! Beat the Buckeyes!
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Stories!

"Braylon was really debating what he wanted to do, but at the end of the day, he felt like it was time to go. He’s kind of down about it because he felt like they stuck with him when he was struggling [to qualify academically]. He loves the fans there and the relationships he’s built with his teammates, so it was hard for him to walk away."

Honestly sounds more like his high school coach is doing all the talking and thinking here, but really, we don't know anything until Heard or Pelini talk here. And I don't see either happening soon.

This Husker team will need to improve ball security and swagger before it's ready to be one play from a national title. Still, you should expect to see a lot of touchdowns this year.

Are you ready for baseball? James serves up the games to list on you calendars! Opening Day is February 15th as Nebraska travels to the Bear Republic.

Former Nebraska women's golfer Madeleine Sheils captured a tournament title in her first event as a professional golfer, winning the season-opening event at Club West on the Cactus Tour Wednesday.

She was in third place going into the final round and finished one shot ahead of the leaders.

Fascinating stuff.

Taylor enters his second season with the Dolphins after being named Assistant Quarterbacks coach on January 30, 2012. In 2012, under Taylor’s direction, quarterback Ryan Tannehillset team rookie records in passing yards (3,294), attempts (484), completions (282) and he became the first quarterback in Dolphins history to start all 16 of the team’s games in his first year in the league.

Congratulations to Zac Taylor on the promotion!

Well, if one set of Mooney grads is going to the 3-4, certainly ANOTHER set of Mooney grads with a struggling defense would also consider a philosophical change, right? They would also be unaware of Nebraska's first two national titles! East and West? What's this? I can't see him saying anything else.

Happening down the road is probably a good thing for Texas -- as in, when Johnny Manziel's eligibility is up.

- Exit fees, exit fees, exit fees: Everyone's carefully watching that Maryland/ACC lawsuit for more than $50 million.

The next round of expansion really all depends on how far down the exit fee gets negotiated.

Remember this when you think someone is being immature.

Take a look - this is kind of neat!

Maybe some day more classes will be held online. And perhaps we'll replace the on-field football with heavily secured college football simulations. And we'll all be trapped indoors...

That's a horrible future. Actually. Like a future without Cobby.

FanPosts!

I love this in the fall, watching football accompanied by a cold Sam Adams Oktoberfest. As a bonus, I'm the only one in my house who likes sauerkraut, so there are always leftovers for me. - Bubbasan With Apricot Glaze! - Bubbasan

*Note: I cannot actually cook this one due to food allergies. But I encourage y'all to give it a shot and leave your comments on Bubbasan's recipe later.

Not the quickest recipe on here, but certainly delicious. They freeze really well, so they're a great make-ahead meal or hearty snack. - BigRedTwice

We're at FOURTEEN RECIPES. Six more, and I have to start cooking!

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That's all for today folks. Please share your outrage glee at Cobby's possible departure disloyaly commitment below! This is the open thread!

Stay here for tonight's game between Nebraska and Ohio State!

- Salt Creek and Stadium

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