Did you see her? She's beautiful! The
already retired faster than the new cy-hawk trophy new mascot of the Kansas State Wildcats is a HAWT-EEE! Her name is EcoKat. Not only is she hot, she is uber cool too! She saves the world!
That's right. She is saving the world through environmentalism! Her costume is made of 90% repurposed material. Whatever the hell that means. My spell checker is even yelling at me for using that word. It kinda sucks because this will be the first time I've EVER written an article and have used one of those words with a squiggly line underneath it. It's shameful. But I'll do it for...her.
ANYWAY. I can't be distracted by words because I want to be distracted by that goddess... It's cool and all that she wants people to recycle, but haven't we been doing this for 20 years? I know they are behind the times in Kansas (what with banning the teaching of common sense, err evolution and all), but have they really just started to recycle there? Maybe Bubba Starling stayed in Kansas City because of her.There I go again! Getting distracted. Look at that outfit she wears. It's the sexiest thing I've seen since Princess Leia in the bikini outfit back in Return of the Jedi. That gives me a great idea! I think I'll ask K-State if I can market this outfit. All the women in the world would love to wear one of these for their guy. We could make BILLIONS. We could use Victoria's Secret as an outlet for getting our product to the masses. We can even personalize it by writing <school name> SUCKS across the front!
I would love to rip off those recycled tatters she is wearing. And if you tear them, you can just toss em in the recycle bin and the earth will be ok! And the best part about her? It's her hair. It reminds me of my mom!