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Bo Pelini to Michigan? to Pitt? Who Makes Up These Absurd Rumors?

Last night, many people got a chuckle out of the Toledo Blade's report that Bo Pelini might be interested in the Michigan job. The report had almost no substance, and closed with the following gem:

"Pelini reportedly turned down the Miami (Fla.) job this offseason, which could be an indication he's willing to leave Nebraska."

That's right...when Pelini's lack of interest in the Miami job means that he's interested in leaving Nebraska.  But to be thorough, the Nebraska media had to follow up with Pelini and get Pelini to deny it. And in this case, it was Eric Olson of the AP, who got the "no interest" response. Silly story, silly rumor...  Nobody in their right mind gave it much credence.  This is exactly the type of situation that Pelini wanted to avoid by saying he didn't respond to rumors when the Miami story got floated, but now needs to denied because so many people flipped out over the response to the Miami story.

Which got me thinking. If people actually believed that Ohio State alum Bo Pelini was interested in the Michigan job, what other rumors could we start? Let's start with Pitt, where the clock is still ticking as the wreckage of Steve Pederson's latest coaching search smolders.

Let's not leave it to college head coaching jobs either. I've heard jokes about Pelini replacing NFL commissioner Roger Goodell.  What about the Yankees signing Pelini?  Or maybe Pelini will get an ESPN "Decision" special to announce he's joining the Miami Heat?  Or better yet, replacing Ron Franklin to team up with Ed Cunningham in the booth. Maybe he's leaving sports completely...perhaps to star in the next James Bond film. Maybe he's dumping Mary Pat and hooking up with one of the Kardashians?  Or joining the Obama administration in the White House?

What rumor would you like to start about Bo?  What's the most absurd? What's the most ridiculous?  Besides Michigan, of course.