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The Unabridged Comments of Baylor Coach Art Briles - Duct Tape Or Baling Wire?

I couldn't help but notice that Baylor Coach Art Briles presser at Big 12 media days was cut short. They must have run out of paper. Or ink. Or maybe their quill went dull. 

Q. Art, coming from Baylor, what are your thoughts on the Big 12 being held together verbally and not contractually?

COACH BRILES: Is it not contractually?

You're telling me stuff that I don't even know.

Q. There's nothing holding the league together. It's just the word of the higher-ups.

COACH BRILES: You're on the inside? That's the word through the media? I don't know.

Honestly, that's the first I've heard of that. I'm sure there will be a contract signed. There's people in that room that know that answer.

I mean, where I'm from, verbally works for me. You know what I'm saying? If I tell you I'm going to do something, I'm going to do it. You may not have to shake my hand. If you look me in the eye and say, Coach, I'm going to be there at practice, I'm going to expect you to be there. If I tell you, I'm going to go out and buy you lunch today, it's my day to buy lunch, forget your billfold.

So verbal works for me.

Depends on where you're from, though. Some people prefer baling wire. Others prefer duct tape. 

I actually prefer they use bailing wire on my hands and ankles, and duct tape over my mouth. Then they can tell me and I'll do whatever they want. 

PETER IRWIN: Coach, thank you very much.

COACH BRILES: Dan Beebe can be so firm, but gentle at the same time. 

PETER IRWIN: No, no, no. That's it, coach, you're done. 

COACH BRILES: Do I get to see them now, my masters? 

PETER IRWIN: What? No.... wait, yes, yes, Coach, just this way, they're waiting for you. 

COACH BRILES: (Shivers visibly with excitement and exits)