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Pay Them Damn Athletes But Watch Out for Bad Air

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So my cousin went to Washington just t’other day and she said while she was there, this guy, some politician started flappin’ his arms about how college athletes aren’t getting paid. How they’re being exploited because they make so much money for the schools. Was going on about ‘free labor’ and how the kids should be paid and rambling on like that.

And the guy just took off. Was flappin’ his arms and his jaw so much, he took off right up into the air. And he stayed up there for a while, trying to convince some other people to join him. I guess this stuff happens a lot in Washington ‘cause only one other guy joined him up there and that guy was a reporter.

And while she’s telling me about this, I’m thinkin’, good God, the only person that would say college athletes aren’t getting paid is some fool who hasn’t had to pay to put his kids through college. That’s damned expensive these days and a lot of those athletes get their school for free.

Not only that, but I remembered that last year the entire Nebraska basketball team got to go to Hawaii for a trip just to play some games. I’ll bet that was damned expensive too. Hell, they wasn’t even that good and they got a free trip to Hawaii. What the hell is that guy talking about that they’re not getting paid. Free school and free trips to Hawaii. What else they want?

But my cousin kept wondering if he took off ‘cause he was that full of hot air or because of the way he was flapping his arms and gums at the same time. And she kept going on about it, I interrupted her and said:

"Ya know, it’s too damned bad that they can’t figure out how to harness all that wind power those blowhard sumbitches put out. Could solve this oil problem straight away."

And she said:

"Oh, hell, they know how to harness all that wind power. They’ve know that for some time. The problem is they ain’t figured out how to get rid of all the toxins in it yet."

Hell, I never even thought of that.