I noticed our buddy TB over at KSU Blog Bring on the Cats was congratulatin' hisself about Kansas being one of the 10 healthiest states in the nation.
Is that Tom Osborne swinging a hammer, hard at work? Darn tootin!
Where is Kansas on that list? At #10. Where is Nebraska? At #6. Iowa? At #7.
In fact, Nebraska was the tops of the entire Big 12, beaten out only by a bunch of smallish North Eastern states like Maine, Vermont, Massachusetts, and New Hampshire that are inhabited by very white rich people. Minnesota was the only non-Northeastern state above Nebraska on the list.
I think it's obvious to every Nebraskan why it's a darned healthy state. Although we drink a fair amount of beer, we're also a hard-working state, unlike Colorado, that came in at #28. No doubt that's because they don't get much exercise and from of all the sulfur fumes frequently escaping the gateway to hell located in Boulder.
Missouri is at #34. I find that surprising. The only thing I can think of is that there's a fine line between blindness and death when you're adding the anti-freeze to some of that stuff people down there drink and they keep getting it wrong.
Dead last in the Big 12 is Texas at #43. We shouldn't fault them too much for it. Texas is so big and wide and people are constantly getting ran over by enormous pickup trucks. With big appetites, big guns, big beef with big horns to impale you and black widow spiders nesting in big hair, it's amazing anyone makes it past 40 there.
One more reason as to why Nebraska is truly The Good Life!